Three words that can save your life, change your life. Words that we yearn to hear from someone else, to us. Words that bring light into our days, words that can transform our thoughts and deeds. Words that hold immense power, as do all words…
“I Love You.”
Yet, why is there so much emphasis on these words coming from someone else when really, they need to come from us – to us. We all have the power to say these words, to make someone else feel the warmth that comes with them, and yet we neglect to say them to ourselves. Not only neglect, but we feel uneasy, unworthy, and self-centred in even contemplating doing so.
Self-love, self-acceptance, self-respect. Without these, we fail ourselves. In failing ourselves, how can we not help but ultimately fail those around us?
Mirror work, advocated by one of my favourite mentors, Louise L Hay, has been something I’ve written of before and something that too many discount, feeling awkward and silly in talking to themselves, let alone in such a manner. I’ve been there, I’ve struggled, I’ve overcome. Not for purposes of promoting Louise’s new book, I’ve come across a short video that I’d like to share with you explaining mirror work and that shows Louise in action: You Can Heal Your Heart With Mirror Work.
In taking mirror work one step further, a step towards empowerment, I’d also like to share the advice given to me, by my native seer, when I was still struggling to come to terms with myself, with my own inner strength, with my worthiness:
Start each day by looking straight into the mirror at yourself and saying:
“I Am Somebody.”
When you do that, you are looking back at God and God is looking at you. You are honouring the Spirit within yourself. This will help you take back your personal power.
I recently came across a letter written by a woman in her mid-sixties who was rejected, sexually, by a new companion, a man who enjoyed everything about her except her aged body. This woman stripped down in front of her mirror and analyzed her physical presence and acknowledged every sag and wrinkle and then chose to embrace and love every single one of them. She chose not to nip, tuck or disguise any of who she is for someone else and to go forward in the knowledge that she is perfect, just as she is, and that this other person’s perceptions were just that, his perceptions. She confidently accepted that reflection in the mirror as who she is, well earned, well seasoned. She said, “I Love You.”
How many of us would have instead crumbled, looked into that same mirror and agreed with all the derogatory remarks delivered to a body no longer in its prime? How many of us would have run out for plastic surgery, support hose and underwear, makeup and what ever else would cover up, alter and disguise who we are? Or worse yet, succumbed to self-loathing and feelings of unworthiness.
I loved some of the remarks posted by friends who joined a movement whereby you “bravely” posted a picture of yourself, sans makeup, to share the “real” them. I was delighted to see that some didn’t have to remove anything, and proudly announced that all of their pictures were, “the real them.” This was not an exercise to promote not using products, clothing etc. that enhance us, make us feel even more special, but an exercise in saying that you love yourself, as yourself.
In truly loving ourselves we can do wonders, go amazing places and become the best that we can be. We can stop the cycle of abuse that we allow due to our feelings of being unworthy of a better way. What a wonderful gift to give to ourselves, to our family, to our friends and to the world.
So, just say it with me now, please, “ I Love You, (insert your name).”
For more about self-love: Perception of Beauty